Some songs, you can’t quite listen to because they hurt too much. They remind you of what you don’t want to remember or admonish you for what you willingly forget.
I guess Derek Webb’s I Repent is that way.
It remind me of the ethos, the creed I live by. It also reminds me how far I fall from it. How every day I wage, and lose, the battle against my ego and my reluctance to embrace humility.
And I forget too often, in my love of material comforts, the good fight for those who have no food to eat and peace is a dream too far distant.
I Repent
(words and music by Derek Webb)
i repent, i repent of my pursuit of america’s dream
i repent, i repent of living like i deserve anything
of my house, my fence, my kids, my wife
in our suburb where we’re safe and white
i am wrong and of these things i repent
i repent, i repent of parading my liberty
i repent. i repent of paying for what i get for free
and for the way i believe that i am living right
by trading sins for others that are easier to hide
i am wrong and of these things i repent
bridge
i repent judging by a law that even i can’t keep
of wearing righteousness like a disguise
to see through the planks in my own eyes
i repent, i repent of trading truth for false unity
i repent, i repent of confusing peace and idolatry
by caring more of what they think than what i know of what we need
by domesticating you until you look just like me
i am wrong and of these things i repent
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